New Song “Hickory” Out 11/22

When I find myself unhappy in my circumstances, I escape into fantasies and lose my footing in reality. I did this as a child when my external world felt like chaos. My dreams made it all feel worth it. But I began to do this in relationships, and that became a problem. I was so in love until I suddenly wasn't anymore, and my mind wandered somewhere else. I would dream of a new love, a better love, one without flaws or problems.

Sometimes, my circumstances were beyond unhappiness, and I really did need to leave, but I was so afraid of being alone. So I would fall into infatuation with the first person who showed me an ounce of the kind of attention I felt like I was missing. Sometimes, it was one-sided. A simple crush that I kept to myself. But sometimes, it wasn't that simple, and my dreams ended up becoming the chaos I was trying to escape. Self Sabotage. And so the cycle would repeat.

Hickory is not a love song; it is the reflection of a deeper wound projected onto the idea of love.